We Dilli-wallahs are very confused nowadays. As the rains pour down on the streets causing puddles, streams, ponds, lakes and rivulets; we cringe in disbelief and shudder at the "keechad" in our midst. The rains are for farmers with agricultural lands in the country and as all of us have gardeners with designer sprinklers for our farm houses and gardens; we want to be spared this misery. We look into our wardrobes and stare at our chiffons, "mulmul chikankari" and woolens and realize we do not have umbrellas, ugly raincoats and gumboots. We therefore decide to skip work and college and pick up the phone to order in food since kantabai has absconded as she too does not possess an umbrella. We are informed by Dominoes that there are no sureties about delivery time during the rains and we get extremely grumpy.
The Municipal Corporation is equally piqued at nature’s incessant showers. They have dug up every road, bus stop, gutter, theatre, stadium with the intention of filling it up before the Commonwealth games and lo behold the trenches have now filled up with paani and started to breed tadpoles in abundance. We watch the ministers, socialites and aam aadmi daintily skip over the rubble hoping that they will not skid through the mud and splash into a nearby pond.
The newbie college students are facing reality with a thud. They wade through muddy water till their knees to reach the metro station. They unfold their pants and climb into their designer Hawaii chappals to enter the trains. They embrace their foray into adulthood through the mud and grime and wonder why Unilever and P & G have to show children rescuing kittens from gutters to make the mothers buy detergent. They throw away the cream shower gels of Body Shop and pick up bars of Dettol, Lifebuoy and Cinthol as their new grooming companions. They decide that individuality paves the way as they no longer iron or gel their hair and prefer to leave it au naturalle.
The Yamuna which is usually nonexistent is apparently rising to danger levels and we read that the Bhakra Nangal is threatening to give way. Reports of Mud slides and cloud bursts causing huge losses face us every morning. Maybe it’s time we all did something about the phenomenon known as global warming as our summers get hotter, winters colder and natural disasters more frequent.
Saturday, August 21, 2010
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Perils of Perfectionism
One of the critical skills needed for achievement is a need for perfectionism ingrained into one’s psyche in the subject of pursuit. While super achievers usually learn to channel their energy into a few areas and switch off in most other avenues, others fall into the common trap of trying to excel in every facet of their life which may be possible in one’s youth but can become a counterproductive trait as one progresses in age, draining one of both energy and zest for life.
Perhaps this occurs due to the carrot and stick upbringing that is incorporated into both our parenting and teaching which most people cannot shake off over the years. One watches individuals who want to be the perfect child, parent, supervisor, peer, subordinate, worker and of course a creative genius in their spare time. We are harsh on ourselves for the way we look, what we eat, what we read, the music we hear and even the company we keep. The house must be immaculate; the food will be gourmet, the plants green and the flowers in the right bloom. It would be nice to have the napkins steam pressed and never to have chipped nail polish.
As the years pass, one wonders at the purpose of this quest for perfection which may result in a few admiring glances and murmurs of appreciation at the cost of a mind which is cluttered with useless reminders of tasks to be done which impediment one’s health. Will it matter if the plant holds a few dry leaves in the living room just as we do as our life progresses? Can one smile at the cobweb when one is being tutored in yoga on the carpet? Even if one can accommodate the slipping away of one’s drive for perfection, will people around be able to get used to a new relaxed person or will they constantly lament at how one has slipped up and reprimand one to get back to the person they admired. Does it really matter if the pedestal is not as high as it used to be for perhaps it was not a place one ever desired to stand on and the basic premise on which it stood was shallow and not reflective of one’s true strengths.
As one looks around and watches relatively young and healthy people pass away ahead of their time we recognise that it is the stress that we create within ourselves in the pursuit of the trivial which is to blame. We need to consciously make way for new avenues with age and graciously let go of our preoccupations of youth in a manner and pace that is driven solely by the individual. This may not be easy in the initial stages but essential for the long term. We also need to recognise this need in people around us and accommodate their change in priorities instead of deputing ourselves as the angels who pull up the socks of all and sundry for a better world.
Perhaps this occurs due to the carrot and stick upbringing that is incorporated into both our parenting and teaching which most people cannot shake off over the years. One watches individuals who want to be the perfect child, parent, supervisor, peer, subordinate, worker and of course a creative genius in their spare time. We are harsh on ourselves for the way we look, what we eat, what we read, the music we hear and even the company we keep. The house must be immaculate; the food will be gourmet, the plants green and the flowers in the right bloom. It would be nice to have the napkins steam pressed and never to have chipped nail polish.
As the years pass, one wonders at the purpose of this quest for perfection which may result in a few admiring glances and murmurs of appreciation at the cost of a mind which is cluttered with useless reminders of tasks to be done which impediment one’s health. Will it matter if the plant holds a few dry leaves in the living room just as we do as our life progresses? Can one smile at the cobweb when one is being tutored in yoga on the carpet? Even if one can accommodate the slipping away of one’s drive for perfection, will people around be able to get used to a new relaxed person or will they constantly lament at how one has slipped up and reprimand one to get back to the person they admired. Does it really matter if the pedestal is not as high as it used to be for perhaps it was not a place one ever desired to stand on and the basic premise on which it stood was shallow and not reflective of one’s true strengths.
As one looks around and watches relatively young and healthy people pass away ahead of their time we recognise that it is the stress that we create within ourselves in the pursuit of the trivial which is to blame. We need to consciously make way for new avenues with age and graciously let go of our preoccupations of youth in a manner and pace that is driven solely by the individual. This may not be easy in the initial stages but essential for the long term. We also need to recognise this need in people around us and accommodate their change in priorities instead of deputing ourselves as the angels who pull up the socks of all and sundry for a better world.
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